A Public Service Annoucement*

There is something that’s happening in our society that is making me question the intelligence of the human race. This “something” is enough to scare anyone into keeping their children locked in the closet for their entire lives. Something so evil that many wake up screaming from the horrible nightmares they cause.

The men’s jean short.



Don’t even get me started on the faded men’s jean short. Christ almighty, I think I just threw up in my mouth a little.

There is no reason on this earth why any male on this planet should own a pair of jean shorts. Well, I guess there is 1 reason. Perhaps you’re going to a costume party and you’re dressing up like white trash. Or maybe you live in Jersey. So technically there are 2 reasons why you own a pair.

People, let’s do society a big favor: let’s outlaw the jean short for men.


*This public service announcement is brought to you by I Have No Inner Monologue: making the world a better place by mocking those lacking in good manners, good looks, and fashion sense.